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cabensonThanks to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
darandkerry for the beta and the following for screencaps:
Screencap Paradise
The Home of the Nutty
Parts 1, 2 and 3
Callie had begun self-medicating herself with hefty doses of ManWhore to stave off her uncontrollable case of GPS. Normally, I would have called her on her shit, but I was having issues of my own.
Both Hahn and I had learned that THE Dr. Preston Burke had won a prestigious surgical award, and neither one of us were happy for him.
In fact, I was so disenchanted, I stopped trying to impressmy girl crush Dr. Hahn during rounds.
And she was so bummed that she lost both the award and HER girl crush that she needed to take it out on someone. I swear she has a Yang punching bag at home.
Later that day, Callie was doodling in her patients’ charts again when she heard someone ask, “It’s because I don’t have a penis, isn’t it?”
Her GPS went into overdrive as she turned around to see Erica reading about THE Dr. Preston Burke’s award.
Callie relaxed a little when she realized that Hahn was talking about why she didn’t get the award, instead of why Callie had chosen to have man sex with McSteamy. When Hahn asked if she wanted to go out for drinks after work to trash Burke, Callie said that she had “another thing”.
As if on cue, the “thing” came waltzing in and bootie bumped Callie right in front of Hahn. Talk about harsh!
Hahn didn’t take that so well and kinda stormed out.
I was paged to assist with a heart transplant, and while we waited for the donor heart to arrive, Hahn thought maybe we could finally, you know, “bond” by trashing THE Dr. Preston Burke.
I was having none of that shit. First of all, I am *not* gonna be her substitute girl crush, and secondly, I wasn’t ready to share my - what is that word again? Oh yeah, “feelings” about THE Dr. Preston Burke. So, she kept rambling, and I kept staring into space.
Okay, this next part I heard from Betty, the nearly invisible scrub nurse (BTNISN). She was in the scrub room with Hahn when Callie walked in, acting like everything was cool with her and Erica. It was so NOT cool.
See, according to BTNISN, Hahn actually has those “feeling” things. And she told Callie how hard it was for her to make friends because she is socially retarded.
And Callie was all like, “Are you jealous because I’m sleeping with Sloan”, and sending out strong vibes like she was hoping Hahn was maybe wanting Callie for herself.
But Hahn was just pissed because Callie got a boy toyand didn’t share, and she felt left out. OMG, Hahn has a soul! And it’s not black and gnarly. It’s all pink… and girly. Ugh!
Callie, in what had become an almost addictive habit, went to McSteamy for sex after her discussion with Erica, but he was bummed because all the nurses were boycotting his ManWhoriness and his surgeries were cancelled. Frustrated, Callie went to Joe’s, where she ran into the true source of her frustration, Erica Hahn
I had to give Callie credit, man, I would never interrupt Hahn when she’s pissed and has a handful of darts. And since I was at the bar, I decided to sit back and enjoy the fireworks.
Callie stumbled around until she finally told Hahn that the She Devil had implied that they were some type of happy lesbo couple. I knew it!
Instead of grabbing Callie in the heated embrace I was expecting, Hahn started laughing. Then Callie started laughing.
And they both laughed these ridiculously fake laughs until they realized that it was really not that funny. I was bummed because there was still no kissing, so I went home.
The next day, Walter Tapley, the God of Cardiothoracic surgery came to Seattle Grace, and everyone was excited to get the chance to meet him, especially Hahn.
She promised the Chief that she would stab someone in the heart if she had to just so Tapley would have something interesting to observe. I admit, her snarkiness is a turn on.
Callie was busy trying to “cure” me of my Burke Funk by dragging me like a two-year old to a play date with my person. Yes, I was bummed because Burke won an award and because my girl crush had a girl crush. Didn’t mean I needed any help from anyone else.
Hahn found out that Tapley was there for a risky surgery and threw a hissy fit. She was NOT gonna kill the God of Cardiothoracic surgery, no way, no how.
I do remember laughing a little when Mer told me how she barged into her therapist’s office, only to find Hahn sitting on the couch. I would’ve LOVED to have been a fly on the wall…
Since McSteamy had decided to turn over a new leaf, Callie had no readily available cure for her GPS. So, she enlisted Erica’s help in teasing the man back to whoriness by suggesting a threesome.
Sloan was having none of that. He wanted it, but he wasn’t having it. Stupid man, you do NOT turn down a threesome that includes HAHN!!!!
While Hahn successfully operated on Tapley, McSteamy turned the tables on Callie and started talking dirty about a threesome with Hahn. I think he knew that something was going on between those two. So many people could see it…too bad they couldn’t.
So, with a career-making surgical save under her belt, Hahn was feeling all kinds of special, and since she was tired of hearing the ManWhore profess his new leafdom, she decided to share the love.
She laid a HUGE one on Callie,
(and yes, I do have a copy of the security tape, thank you Barbie’s underpants),
told McSteamy he couldn’t handle a threesome with her,
and then she strutted out of the elevator like the Queen Shit that she is.
The ManWhore got his woody back, but the person most affected? Yep, Callie.
Can’t deny that loving feeling anymore, can ya, sucker?
Today was the day that a Very Big Trauma changed everyone’s life. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t that dramatic, but it was, so shut up and listen.
McSteamy was dirty talking his way through sex, and Callie was totally into it. The fantasy this time? A threesome…with HAHN. I think Callie was starting to see the lights shining off the Goodship Sapphic.
Mer helped me get my mojo back by giving me the Sparkle Pager. Now, I didn’t have to worry about Hahn kicking me out of the OR. I just hoped she’d show respect for the Sparkle Pager Rules, as they are sacrosanct.
Callie was late to the party as usual,
but Erica sure was happy to see her, acting all cool and stuff, like she hadn’t kissed Callie senseless in an elevator.)
I knew it was gonna be a weird day when Callie reacted, well, weirdly to Hahn,
and Hahn acknowledged that weird look with a weird look of her own. Did I mention this was a weird day?
McSteamy taunting Callie certainly didn’t help. And what was all that talk about “she uses one finger…”?
So, anyway, this big trauma came in - some idiot boy jumped in a vat of fast-drying cement to impress a girl. I swear boys and their boy penises are SO stupid sometimes.
We were all shocked, but soon enough, egos set in and everyone started arguing about how to proceed.
Hahn and McSteamy were close to a throwdown and what do ya know?
Callie sided with Erica. Oh, this is SO on!
So, we were working on Cement Boy, and Hahn was treating me even worse than usual.
Callie was kinda ignoring Hahn, and lemme tell you, you couldn’t cut through the tension with a ten- blade.
And when Hahn reached across Callie to get the gel,
and then Callie looked her in the eyes,
and then kinda leaned closer to Hahn, I swear I almost asked to be excused, ‘cause THAT is just how hot those two are.
We all took a break as the firemen continued to remove the cement from the patient.
Callie came in after booking an OR and took her drink from Erica. I saw their hands touch; she can’t hide that shit from me. I see gay people!
She made some space between herself and Hahn, but I’m not sure Hahn even noticed. See, Hahn was thinking.
And when Hahn thinks, she drinks.
More thinking meant more drinking.
And when Bailey finally realized they needed to cath Cement Boy, the thinking and drinking stopped, and Hahn went into action.
We eventually freed Cement Boy, and as expected, he crashed and was rushed to the OR.
I was in the OR with Hahn, but remember Betty, the Nearly Invisible Scrub Nurse (BTNISN)? Well, she told me that she saw Callie watching the surgery through the scrub room.
And according to BTNISN, the only person Callie had her eyes on
was Erica.
McSteamy came in and showed Callie that he really wasn’t such a ManWhore when he told her that he knew she had feelings for Erica and that it was okay. Who taught him how to be so sensitive?
Now this next part was kinda rough, and I’m still not sure how I feel about it. See, Hahn had finished her part of the surgery, and the Chief, Bailey, and I were finishing up when Cement Boy threw a clot. Chief told me to go ahead and attempt to remove it while we waited for Hahn to return.
When she did scrub back in, she was not at all thrilled that I was already performing the procedure.
She criticized every move I made and even tried to take over until I told her to shut up and let me work. What I really wanted to tell her was to please go get laid, because seriously, she needed it.
To say she was shocked would be an understatement.
And to make thing worse, the Chief reamed her a new one about not teaching me,
not realizing that I was sitting behind Hahn.
And then SHE saw I was there when she left. Bad form all around, but I took Chief’s words to Hahn personally and started teaching the Junior Grey a new surgical suture.
Taking a break from being a successful surgeon AND mentor, I went to watch the storm out of the second story foyer window. The show I saw was much better than any storm, lemme tell you.
Callie and McSteamy were leaving, and Callie was trying to get one more dose of GPS cure out of him, but no, he was a changed man, and he pointed Callie toward what HE knew she really wanted-
Erica
Callie was hesitant at first, but then she steeled herself,
and walked over to Hahn. who was distracted and bitching about me and her lost keys.
Callie finally got her attention
and tried to tell Erica how she felt, but her words were broken.
So she kissed her.
And kissed her some more
For a split second, I thought Hahn was going to step back and tell Callie that she didn’t like her that way
but she didn’t, no, she grabbed Callielike I wished she would grab me
and kissed her back…and I’m pretty sure she used tongue.
So, anyway, that’s how Callie and Hahn were gayed and how I won $100 off Karev. Never bet against a girl in the know, especially when it comes to girl on girl action.
Now I want to go call Georgie and ask him if he knows his ex is a lez.
But first, I need figure out how to sneak Hahn’s keys back into her bag so they can go to HER place next time. .
darandkerry for the beta and the following for screencaps:Screencap Paradise
The Home of the Nutty
Parts 1, 2 and 3
Callie had begun self-medicating herself with hefty doses of ManWhore to stave off her uncontrollable case of GPS. Normally, I would have called her on her shit, but I was having issues of my own.
Both Hahn and I had learned that THE Dr. Preston Burke had won a prestigious surgical award, and neither one of us were happy for him.
In fact, I was so disenchanted, I stopped trying to impress
And she was so bummed that she lost both the award and HER girl crush that she needed to take it out on someone. I swear she has a Yang punching bag at home.
Later that day, Callie was doodling in her patients’ charts again when she heard someone ask, “It’s because I don’t have a penis, isn’t it?”
Her GPS went into overdrive as she turned around to see Erica reading about THE Dr. Preston Burke’s award.
Callie relaxed a little when she realized that Hahn was talking about why she didn’t get the award, instead of why Callie had chosen to have man sex with McSteamy. When Hahn asked if she wanted to go out for drinks after work to trash Burke, Callie said that she had “another thing”.
As if on cue, the “thing” came waltzing in and bootie bumped Callie right in front of Hahn. Talk about harsh!
Hahn didn’t take that so well and kinda stormed out.
I was paged to assist with a heart transplant, and while we waited for the donor heart to arrive, Hahn thought maybe we could finally, you know, “bond” by trashing THE Dr. Preston Burke.
I was having none of that shit. First of all, I am *not* gonna be her substitute girl crush, and secondly, I wasn’t ready to share my - what is that word again? Oh yeah, “feelings” about THE Dr. Preston Burke. So, she kept rambling, and I kept staring into space.
Okay, this next part I heard from Betty, the nearly invisible scrub nurse (BTNISN). She was in the scrub room with Hahn when Callie walked in, acting like everything was cool with her and Erica. It was so NOT cool.
See, according to BTNISN, Hahn actually has those “feeling” things. And she told Callie how hard it was for her to make friends because she is socially retarded.
And Callie was all like, “Are you jealous because I’m sleeping with Sloan”, and sending out strong vibes like she was hoping Hahn was maybe wanting Callie for herself.
But Hahn was just pissed because Callie got a boy toy
Callie, in what had become an almost addictive habit, went to McSteamy for sex after her discussion with Erica, but he was bummed because all the nurses were boycotting his ManWhoriness and his surgeries were cancelled. Frustrated, Callie went to Joe’s, where she ran into the true source of her frustration, Erica Hahn
I had to give Callie credit, man, I would never interrupt Hahn when she’s pissed and has a handful of darts. And since I was at the bar, I decided to sit back and enjoy the fireworks.
Callie stumbled around until she finally told Hahn that the She Devil had implied that they were some type of happy lesbo couple. I knew it!
Instead of grabbing Callie in the heated embrace I was expecting, Hahn started laughing. Then Callie started laughing.
And they both laughed these ridiculously fake laughs until they realized that it was really not that funny. I was bummed because there was still no kissing, so I went home.
The next day, Walter Tapley, the God of Cardiothoracic surgery came to Seattle Grace, and everyone was excited to get the chance to meet him, especially Hahn.
She promised the Chief that she would stab someone in the heart if she had to just so Tapley would have something interesting to observe. I admit, her snarkiness is a turn on.
Callie was busy trying to “cure” me of my Burke Funk by dragging me like a two-year old to a play date with my person. Yes, I was bummed because Burke won an award and because my girl crush had a girl crush. Didn’t mean I needed any help from anyone else.
Hahn found out that Tapley was there for a risky surgery and threw a hissy fit. She was NOT gonna kill the God of Cardiothoracic surgery, no way, no how.
I do remember laughing a little when Mer told me how she barged into her therapist’s office, only to find Hahn sitting on the couch. I would’ve LOVED to have been a fly on the wall…
Since McSteamy had decided to turn over a new leaf, Callie had no readily available cure for her GPS. So, she enlisted Erica’s help in teasing the man back to whoriness by suggesting a threesome.
Sloan was having none of that. He wanted it, but he wasn’t having it. Stupid man, you do NOT turn down a threesome that includes HAHN!!!!
While Hahn successfully operated on Tapley, McSteamy turned the tables on Callie and started talking dirty about a threesome with Hahn. I think he knew that something was going on between those two. So many people could see it…too bad they couldn’t.
So, with a career-making surgical save under her belt, Hahn was feeling all kinds of special, and since she was tired of hearing the ManWhore profess his new leafdom, she decided to share the love.
She laid a HUGE one on Callie,
(and yes, I do have a copy of the security tape, thank you Barbie’s underpants),
told McSteamy he couldn’t handle a threesome with her,
and then she strutted out of the elevator like the Queen Shit that she is.
The ManWhore got his woody back, but the person most affected? Yep, Callie.
Can’t deny that loving feeling anymore, can ya, sucker?
Today was the day that a Very Big Trauma changed everyone’s life. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t that dramatic, but it was, so shut up and listen.
McSteamy was dirty talking his way through sex, and Callie was totally into it. The fantasy this time? A threesome…with HAHN. I think Callie was starting to see the lights shining off the Goodship Sapphic.
Mer helped me get my mojo back by giving me the Sparkle Pager. Now, I didn’t have to worry about Hahn kicking me out of the OR. I just hoped she’d show respect for the Sparkle Pager Rules, as they are sacrosanct.
Callie was late to the party as usual,
but Erica sure was happy to see her, acting all cool and stuff, like she hadn’t kissed Callie senseless in an elevator.)
I knew it was gonna be a weird day when Callie reacted, well, weirdly to Hahn,
and Hahn acknowledged that weird look with a weird look of her own. Did I mention this was a weird day?
McSteamy taunting Callie certainly didn’t help. And what was all that talk about “she uses one finger…”?
So, anyway, this big trauma came in - some idiot boy jumped in a vat of fast-drying cement to impress a girl. I swear boys and their boy penises are SO stupid sometimes.
We were all shocked, but soon enough, egos set in and everyone started arguing about how to proceed.
Hahn and McSteamy were close to a throwdown and what do ya know?
Callie sided with Erica. Oh, this is SO on!
So, we were working on Cement Boy, and Hahn was treating me even worse than usual.
Callie was kinda ignoring Hahn, and lemme tell you, you couldn’t cut through the tension with a ten- blade.
And when Hahn reached across Callie to get the gel,
and then Callie looked her in the eyes,
and then kinda leaned closer to Hahn, I swear I almost asked to be excused, ‘cause THAT is just how hot those two are.
We all took a break as the firemen continued to remove the cement from the patient.
Callie came in after booking an OR and took her drink from Erica. I saw their hands touch; she can’t hide that shit from me. I see gay people!
She made some space between herself and Hahn, but I’m not sure Hahn even noticed. See, Hahn was thinking.
And when Hahn thinks, she drinks.
More thinking meant more drinking.
And when Bailey finally realized they needed to cath Cement Boy, the thinking and drinking stopped, and Hahn went into action.
We eventually freed Cement Boy, and as expected, he crashed and was rushed to the OR.
I was in the OR with Hahn, but remember Betty, the Nearly Invisible Scrub Nurse (BTNISN)? Well, she told me that she saw Callie watching the surgery through the scrub room.
And according to BTNISN, the only person Callie had her eyes on
was Erica.
McSteamy came in and showed Callie that he really wasn’t such a ManWhore when he told her that he knew she had feelings for Erica and that it was okay. Who taught him how to be so sensitive?
Now this next part was kinda rough, and I’m still not sure how I feel about it. See, Hahn had finished her part of the surgery, and the Chief, Bailey, and I were finishing up when Cement Boy threw a clot. Chief told me to go ahead and attempt to remove it while we waited for Hahn to return.
When she did scrub back in, she was not at all thrilled that I was already performing the procedure.
She criticized every move I made and even tried to take over until I told her to shut up and let me work. What I really wanted to tell her was to please go get laid, because seriously, she needed it.
To say she was shocked would be an understatement.
And to make thing worse, the Chief reamed her a new one about not teaching me,
not realizing that I was sitting behind Hahn.
And then SHE saw I was there when she left. Bad form all around, but I took Chief’s words to Hahn personally and started teaching the Junior Grey a new surgical suture.
Taking a break from being a successful surgeon AND mentor, I went to watch the storm out of the second story foyer window. The show I saw was much better than any storm, lemme tell you.
Callie and McSteamy were leaving, and Callie was trying to get one more dose of GPS cure out of him, but no, he was a changed man, and he pointed Callie toward what HE knew she really wanted-
Erica
Callie was hesitant at first, but then she steeled herself,
and walked over to Hahn. who was distracted and bitching about me and her lost keys.
Callie finally got her attention
and tried to tell Erica how she felt, but her words were broken.
So she kissed her.
And kissed her some more
For a split second, I thought Hahn was going to step back and tell Callie that she didn’t like her that way
but she didn’t, no, she grabbed Callie
and kissed her back…and I’m pretty sure she used tongue.
So, anyway, that’s how Callie and Hahn were gayed and how I won $100 off Karev. Never bet against a girl in the know, especially when it comes to girl on girl action.
Now I want to go call Georgie and ask him if he knows his ex is a lez.
But first, I need figure out how to sneak Hahn’s keys back into her bag so they can go to HER place next time. .
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no subject
Date: 2008-07-28 12:41 pm (UTC)