CB's Question of the Day

[cabenson]

Yesterday, after having lunch (margaritas!!) and getting some crap for the house, Mrs. CB and I hit the comic book store. Nothing grabbed our attention (except for the convo between two guys who will both NEVER get laid) so we grabbed a couple of the local indy rags and went home.

Later, Mrs. CB read the following personal ad:

Professional, Jewish shemale priest ISO (in search of) para or quadraplegic Asian ladyboy for nude communion and wheelchair races.

People really submit this stuff?!


So my question is:

If you were to write your LJ personal ad, how would it read?

Anonymous comments welcome and IP tracking is turned off, so be honest and have at it.

I gotta take fat bastard to the vet

Comments

[noir-moll.livejournal.com]

Lanky, cranky self-centered tomboy with foul mouth and latent redneck tendencies (has been known to shoot discarded plumbing fixtures on the side of rural roads) seeks femme fatale with legs 'til Tuesday for torrid love affair and eventual betrayal in which I'm left bleeding to death in dark alley while femme fatale flees to Buenos Aires with the loot from the heist we did...or, seeks Girl Friday with heart of gold to save me from my femme fatale fixation.